Robocop (1987) review

Robocop posterDirector: Paul Verhoeven

Starring: Peter Weller, Nancy Allen, Kurtwood Smith, Miguel Ferrer, Dan O’Herlihy, Ronny Cox

REPORTER – “Robo! Excuse me Robo, any special message for all the kids watching at home?”

ROBOCOP – “Stay out of trouble.”

What can be said about Robocop that hasn’t already been said? Probably that it’s a satirical medieval-themed romp about an enchanted candlestick. And that’s probably because it isn’t entirely accurate.

Still, I might as well throw my opinion into the endless ocean of praise it’s received since its released back in 1987, just in case you’ve already heard 17,000 people say it’s great and you’re the sort of person who isn’t convinced unless you’ve heard 17,001. Continue reading “Robocop (1987) review”

Robot Wars (1993) review

Robot Wars posterDirector: Albert Band

Starring: Don Michael Paul, Barbara Crampton, James Staley, Lisa Rinna, Danny Kamekona

DRAKE – “It’s getting ugly out here chief, request surface troops on the double.”

LT PLUNKETT – “Request denied. Stop acting like a weak sister.”

As you may have guessed, this review isn’t about the 1998 BBC TV show in which Craig Charles commentated while a bunch of pale recluses battled their own custom-made robots, before fidgeting nervously as the producers cruelly get a beautiful woman to try and get an excruciating interview out of them.

No, this is yet another low-budget offering by beloved B-movie studio Full Moon, this time pitting two massive mechanical monstrosities against each other while the filmmakers cruelly get a beautiful woman to try and solve a mystery in the process.

So you see, it’s very different. Except for the big robots and the beautiful woman. And the cruelty. Continue reading “Robot Wars (1993) review”