The Proper Mental List

In the years since I started That Was A Bit Mental, the site’s remit has expanded. Now I no longer just review completely insane films, I also tend to cover standard horror and non-horror films: as long as they’re aren’t completely run-of-the-mill, of course.

However, I realise that due to the site’s title, some people come here expecting reviews of only the silliest and weirdest films – the sort of people who would read a review of Scream and say “eh? That’s not mental, that’s just a slasher film”.

I understand. That’s why I’ve put together the Proper Mental list. These are the films reviewed on the site that will truly have you saying “what the fuck was that all about” as the credits roll. These are the ones that fit the original That Was A Bit Mental remit of movies that are just batshit mad.

So, if you’re planning a house party and want to watch a ridiculous film with a group of mates, one that you can all agree when it’s over that you’ve never seen anything like that before, then this is the list you should be referring to.

And if you ever want to find this page again, just look up – there’s a permanent link to it at the top of each page, along with links to the TWABM Hall Of Fame and Hall Of Shame.

Ladies, gentlemen, organisms who fall into neither or both categories, I give to you the Truly Mental list.

HORROR

Alien Terminator (1995)
Genetic experiment goes wrong in an underground lab and spawns a man in a bad monster costume

Alien Undead (2010)
Genetic experiment goes wrong in an underground lab and spawns multiple men in bad monster costumes. In Australia 

Alligator (1980)
Baby alligator dumped down the toilet feasts on genetically modified puppies, grows huge and terrorises Chicago

Arcade (1993)
An evil virtual reality machine, powered by the brain cells of  dead child, captures any teenager who plays it

Beware: Children At Play (1989)
A group of missing children become cannibals and are then slaughtered by their parents in gory detail 

The Beyond (1981)
Woman moves to New Orleans to open a hotel. Turns out she’s only gone and bloody opened one built on a gateway to Hell 

Blood Feast (1963)
Arguably the first truly gory movie, in which a crazed party host plans to kill women to resurrect an Egyptian queen

The Boneyard (1991)
A psychic, some policemen and morticians are stuck in a morgue with three zombie children and a soon-to-be- mutant poodle

Burial Ground (1981)
A bunch of zombies are unleashed on a mansion for no real reason. This results in the most uncomfortable breastfeeding scene in movie history

Cannibal Holocaust (1980)
A crew of filmmakers go to South America to make a documentary on a tribe of cannibals and unwittingly turn it into a cookery show instead

Contamination (1980)
Alien eggs arrive on Earth, courtesy of a former Mars explorer being mind-controlled by an evil Cyclops. Plus there’s gore

The Creeps (1997)
A bumbling scientist accidentally summons midget versions of Dracula, Frankenstein’s monster, the Wolfman and the Mummy

Dead Heat (1988)
A cop is killed and turned into a zombie. He needs to stop the man responsible before he rots away

Deadly Friend (1986)
Your typical ‘boy meets girl, girl dies, boy swaps her brain for his pet robot’s CPU and reanimates her’ story

Dinoshark (2010)
A dinosaur crossed with a shark decides it’s time to eat some Mexicans

Faces Of Death (1978)
Grim video nasty showing footage of dead bodies and animal killings – some fake, some horribly real

The Gingerdead Man (2005)
Group of teens in a bakery are tormented by a small baked murderer played by Gary Busey

Hellgate (1989)
A dead teenager is resurrected by her dad so she can seduce men and bring back to her ghost town so he can kill them. Look, the whole thing makes very little sense

Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers (1988)
A private dick tries to rescue a missing girl who’s joined a cult of chainsaw-worshipping prostitutes

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)
Creepy German doctor kidnaps three victims and sews them arse-to-mouth to create a single creature

Humanoids From The Deep (1980)
Slimy half-man half-fish monsters invade a small fishing community, slaughtering the men and raping the woman. And killing dogs too

Jason X (2001)
The tenth Friday The 13th film, in which Jason goes to space and is turned into a robotic killing machine

Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988)
A bunch of aliens dressed like clowns arrive in a small rural town and start imprisoning the townsfolk in candyfloss cocoons

Killjoy (2000)
Ghetto kid sick of being picked on uses voodoo to resurrect an evil gangsta clown demon

The Langoliers (1995)
A group of people wake up during a flight and realise all the other passengers and crew have disappeared

Leprechaun In The Hood (2000)
Mythical Irish midget travels to the ghetto to get his magic flute back from Ice-T 

Mega Piranha (2010)
Special forces tough guy teams up with Tiffany to stop a wave of mutated piranha fish swallowing Florida

Mega Python Vs Gatoroid (2011)
Tiffany and Debbie Gibson clash heads as giant snakes and alligators do the same

Nazis At The Center Of The Earth (2012)
A group of scientists in Antartica find a hidden underground complex where Nazis are trying to resurrect Hitler and put him in a giant robot

Night Of The Bloody Apes (1969)
Doctor’s son is dying so he replaces his heart with a gorilla’s, but the son becomes half-gorilla and wrecks the joint

Please Don’t Eat My Mother (1973)
Pervert buys a plant that grows ten feet tall and wants to eat people

The Prophecy (1995)
Christopher Walken is a fallen angel come to Earth to steal a dead colonel’s soul from the mouth of a young girl

Puppet Master 4 (1993)
A dead German’s reanimated puppets team up with an AI researcher to defeat a bunch of evil creatures sent by a demon from another dimension

Rock ‘n’ Roll Nightmare (1987)
A Canadian heavy metal rocker tries his hand at acting and screenwriting by putting himself in a movie where he fights the Devil. Shitness ensues.

Rubber (2010)
A rubber tyre rolls around the desert, blowing things up with its psychic powers

Sharktopus (2010)
A genetic experiment goes wrong, creating a shark that you can’t escape on land

Sleepaway Camp (1983)
Cheesy camp slasher with one of the genuinely greatest endings in cinematic history

Snakes On A Train (2006)
Cursed woman vomits snakes which then terrorise passengers. Typical Virgin Trains

The Wasp Woman (1959)
The owner of a cosmetics firm tries a serum that reverses ageing. Unfortunately, it also turns her into a giant killer wasp monster. Swings and roundabouts

Zombie Strippers (2008)
A zombie gets into a strip club and attacks one of the strippers. Guess what happens next

NON-HORROR

Airplane vs Volcano (2014)
Dean Cain tries to fly a plane over a bunch of erupting volcanoes for an hour and a half

Attack Of The Super Monsters (1982)
Big rubber dinosaurs attack Japan in this part-anime, part-monster movie madfest

Bad Channels (1992)
Aliens invade a radio station and start kidnapping women by using its switchboard to suck them through the phone lines

Bruce Lee Fights Back From The Grave (1976)
A man who definitely isn’t Bruce Lee does some fighting, none of which is back from any graves

Confessions (2010)
Incredible Japanese movie about a school teacher who decides to punish two of her students for murdering her young daughter

Cube (1997)
Six prisoners awaken inside a massive cube and have no idea why they’re there or how to get out

Dollman (1991)
Kick-ass hero from another planet comes to Earth and realises he’s only thirteen inches tall 

Exam (2009)
Ten candidates at a job interview are given a blank sheet of paper and told to answer a question that doesn’t exist

For Y’ur Height Only (1981)
A 2’9″ Filipino spy tries to take down an evil organisation hell-bent on world domination

Hell Comes To Frogtown (1988)
Rowdy Roddy Piper is tasked with repopulating the human race in a post-apocalyptic Earth while also fighting frog people

Hobo With A Shotgun (2011)
Homeless chap decides to take the law into his own hands and bring peace to a lawless neighbourhood. With a shotgun

Phantom Of The Paradise (1974)
Wronged music composer dons a helmet and threatens to destroy a concert hall’s opening night. Cue loads of mental glam rock stuff

Scooby-Doo! Wrestlemania Mystery (2014)
The Scooby gang head to WWE City to help Vince McMahon, John Cena and chums defeat an evil ghost bear

Test Tube Teens From The Year 2000 (1994)
Two teens from the future go back in time to stop the headmistress of an all-girl school from taking over the world and banning sex

Turkey Shoot (1982)
A group of prisoners are freed from an evil dictator’s death camp and hunted by the dictator and his cronies

Voyage Of The Rock Aliens (1984)
A group of music-loving extraterrestrials land on Earth to try to find the source of rock music

Zardoz (1974)
Sean Connery plays a mortal who finds himself in a land of immortals. Oh, and he wears tiny red pants for some reason

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